"I never would have imagined that at the age of 6 that I would have to deal with my daughter being teased repeatedly," says Lisa, 36, whose daughter, Jackie, went from being a happy child to eventually coming home from school in tears. Lisa learned that her daughter was being chided for her handwriting and taunted by a girl who was supposed to be her friend. Jackie's demeanor changed and she was no longer enthusiastic about learning and school activities as the bullying persisted. "Jackie's feelings seem to be affected by it more," Lisa explains. "I don't want her to lose her positive outlook on life and I'd like to find a way to get this to stop."

Rachael introduces Lisa to Little Girls Can Be Mean author, Dr. Michelle Anthony, who says it's not unusual for kids to bully at the start of elementary school. "The dangerous [bullying] stories that we hear about in middle school and high school, they all have their roots in kindergarten," she explains. Dr. Anthony's own daughter was bullied at that age and she discovered it was often caused by kids who had not yet learned how to relate to others in their class. "What you're trying to do is be powerful or make a friend, but you're just going through it the wrong way," she says. "Nice girls can do mean things and still be nice girls, they just don't yet have the right tools to do it with." So what can parents do? Dr Anthony suggests a 4-step approach to help your kids express their feelings and learn new approaches to their friendships. She is optimistic that moms like Lisa can use this strategy to empower their girls to make new friends and cope with the bully. "If we can give them that, than we can change [it]!"

Observe your child's behavior to detect a problem. When young children are upset about something at school, Dr. Anthony says they often don't know how to express that in words. "So they tell you a different way," she says to Lisa, "like you saw with the crying or the changes in behavior. Sometimes you'll see increased fights with siblings, or they'll say things like, 'She wouldn't play with me' or 'I'm not invited to her party.' Those kinds of things tell us something is going on and my daughter's feeling alone; I want to connect with her."

Connect and reassure your child. Once you know your daughter is upset, use simple statements to encourage a dialogue. "Say things like, 'Gosh I notice when you come home it seems like this,' or 'How does it feel to you when your friend says this to you?' All of a sudden she can begin to talk about her experiences and understand them better."

Guide your child through the experience. Dr. Anthony suggests a role play with your daughter so she can hear how she sounds in situations and gain the confidence to approach other kids in school and make new friends.

Support her actions. Encourage your child to get excited about making new friends through her own initiatives, like by inviting someone over for a play date. "And she starts small and she builds so that over time she's a different person entering into that social network, because you can't control what the other girls do," Dr. Anthony explains, "but how she is influenced by it and how she responds to it is really where you make that impact!"