Jeanette and Tom from Milltown, New Jersey, have been married for 14 years and have three children. The couple explained to Dr. Drew Pinsky that because of the kids, as well as their busy work and volunteer schedules, their sex life isn't as active as it used to be.
"Prior to kids, our sex life was incredible, it was frequent — and then once the kids came it definitely died down quite a bit," Jeanette says. "We're kind of crossing paths and not meeting in the bed."
Dr. Drew gave the couple some very specific homework. He told Jeanette to write out five coupons — tickets that she can redeem with Tom in the bedroom over the course of one week.
She wrote down:
- Sensual massage
- Make love not just sex
- Just foreplay
- Passionate sex
- 1 hour of sex
"Every time she uses that ticket, you will create the time and space to have physical contact with her," the doc explained to Tom.
The couple kept a video diary documenting how the experiment went, then met up with Dr. Drew on our show to discuss.
"I feel like it's brought us back emotionally, physically, it gave us that spark that we were lacking," Jeanette says of the experiment.
Dr. Drew stresses that maintaining a healthy sex life is an important part of any loving and successful marriage, especially when raising children. "Marital satisfaction drops during the elementary school years, it's very common," he says.
This kind of exercise can help with a couple's communication both in the bedroom and outside of it.
"It's a great foundation for passion," Dr. Drew says. "We don't really spell that out enough for people and so they let it drift, but don't let that drift away."